(no subject)

[clairelittleton.livejournal.com]

Title: Everything Will Not Be Alright
Character's: All, mostly Claire.
Summary: Claire and the others make it back to the beach in Through The Looking Glass, and she finds out what happens to Charlie, and finds his ring.
Disclaimer: Not a LOST writer, this is just fun fan fic.

This is my first fan fic, kinda. Everytime I would hear the song from Imogen Heap "Hide and Seek" or Oasis's "Wonderwall" this kept popping into my head so I had to write it down, be gentle, please.




"Claire listen to me. I'm going to protect you. I'm going to protect Aaron. I promise. Everything is going to be fine."

Overzealous to get back to the beach after they had discovered they were going to be rescued, Claire smiled down at Aaron, a true mothers smile in hopes of returning as soon as possible. The mere thoughts of it brought the light butterfly feeling to the pit of her stomach. To finally go back home to Australia, and to see her mum. A lingering hope she would be free from her hospitalized coma, seeing her with forgiving eyes as her mum got to see her beautiful grandson for the first time. To prove to her how much she had changed since she had been away. Carrying on with the rest of the group, her pace picked up a bit, because then there was Charlie.

How would she introduce him to her? A secret smile crept up on her lips, giving that loving look to her son. H had asked her not to worry about him, and she promised. She forced herself to hide the worry in her eyes when they spoke, before he went off, she trusted him, and knew he wouldn't do anything that would cause him to not come back to the both of them. To her. But from what Desmond had warned Charlie of, and now knowing their shared secret, she couldn't help but ask every so often.

"What about Charlie, did he make it back yet?"

"Not yet, but they're probably paddling home as we speak. Don't worry, I'm sure he's fine."


Pushing further on, Claire passed the few who were ahead of her, Aaron kept crying as if he knew something she didn't. Placing her finger along his gums, trying to ease whatever was making him cry. Kissing his soft chubby cheek, reassuring him they would be home soon.

"And we'll see Charlie, yes we will. We're going home Aaron" Claire giggled down at her son. Knowing every step she took was bringing her closer to rescue.

Half smiling over at Sun who was also hurrying to get back to Jin. For once she could share that feeling with someone. Her entire life there were always only a few people who loved her enough, and now, he was one of them. When she got back, she swore she would tell him so, she thought about wrapping her arms around him and never letting go. Wanting to see that look he would give her, a look of hope and of secret affection. As if no one else on the island existed. But she and Aaron. For the first time in so long, she felt she really belonged to a family, who wanted her in return. And this time, she wouldn't mess it up. Claire had pushed people away for so long, too long. After finding out about her father and the guilt she carried for her mum. She didn't need anyone, she told herself so many times, at one point even her own baby, but now she needed him, and Charlie.

It felt like the hike was shorter getting back, the smoke from a fire Hurley and Sawyer had made billowed above the trees. The rest of the group started running toward the beach in joyous victory and waving hands. Kate and Jack shared a relived glance while both Claire, Rose and Sun looked on for whom they were really returning for. Craning her beck, Claire couldn't see any of them. Bouncing Aaron, smile was found when she saw the rest of them on the shore.

"Over there.." She called out to the other woman. Like a race Sun ran toward the sand as did Rose. Claire following at a slower pace she saw Desmond slumped on the sand, wet, Sawyer and Hurley standing over him, looking sullen. Tight embraces with the other couples, Claire looked around to see where Charlie had run off to.

"Desmond?" Shaking her head a little, a soft confused chuckle, smiling. "Where's Charlie?" Both Sawyer and Hurley stepped back when Jack and Kate came over. All of them sharing looks of both relief and exhaustion. Jack slapped Hurly on the shoulder in a hug, and sniffed looking down at Desmond. But only one of them spoke.

"I'm..sorry Claire..." Holding out a wet piece of paper to her. He had tried to save what he could from the dive. Looking down at what he was holding up. No, she thought, shaking her head looking over at Sawyer and Hurley. but it was Sawyer who leaned in to Kate telling her she might want to get Aaron.

"What do you mean..sorry? Sorry for what, Where's Charlie, Desmond..." Her voice raised and even more demanding, when the corners of her eyes narrowed. Kate's hand flew to her mouth as Jack repeated what Claire had asked. Pulling away from Kate, Claire didn't want Aaron taken away from her. "No...no.." Shaking her head in denial. Claire repeated looking out into the ocean.

"Aye..I tried, I did, I tried..." Cupping his face and waving his palms out. Looking up at everyone, but especially Claire. His own guilt for not running faster toward the door, for not trying to break the glass, anything he could have done, going over and over again the things he shouldn't have done. "You have to understand..he just didn't want to be saved...he did it for us..for you...Claire and for Aaron..." Snapping the paper out of his hand, it ripped in two.

Aaron started crying again, his wails growing louder. Jack started an uproar as he squatted down to Desmond, Kate turned away as her own tears finally came. The price they paid to get rescued almost not worth it. Sawyer backed away, almost consoling Kate. This brought more and more of the trailing group closer, Rose, Bernard Sun, Jin, Juliette, everyone. But they didn't matter. Claire never took her gaze off of Desmond who was being drilled by Jack as to what had happened. But Claire couldn't hear anything, as if the pain in her heart closed everyone out, both she and Desmond shared a lingering stare.

"You promised..." She whispered with a tight jaw as tears flowed from her eyes blinding her view. Squeezing Aaron closer to her, the wet halves of the paper in her hand, she walked away from all of them.

"Claire, wait!" Sun came running after her but stopped just a little behind as Claire ignored her.

She couldn't get Aaron to stop crying, she couldn't even stop crying. She wanted to lash out, to throw something, but she couldn't. She had her son to look after, she wanted so much to break down and run into the water and find him, he knew he wasn't that great of a swimmer, what the hell was he thinking? Why did he leave her, why now that she needed him most did he have to sacrifice himself for anyone. Wiping at her eyes, trying to shush Aaron, reaching up to her head. She was a horrible mum, she thought.

Finding their camp, no, hers now. Alone again. Staining Aaron's island made baby clothes with her tears she bounced him again. "Shh come on Aaron..please!" She cried out, falling back to sit on the hard cot. She didn't know if she could do this. Continuing to cry, Aaron seemed to shutter, catching his breathe when he started to quiet his own wails, reaching up to grab her nose looking up at her. "It's alright, mummy's here.." Still questioning why, as her sadness changed to anger at Charlie. For leaving her, for lying to her.

"You need some help?"
"Why didn't you tell me you were going to do this?"
"I didn't want you to worry."
"Well its dangerous, isn't it? Swimming into some underwater station."
"It's what needs to be done to get us all rescued. I'll be fine, Claire. Now you've gotta promise me something. While I'm gone. Don't worry about me."
"..okay."
"I'll take him."
"Thanks".
"Hey! All right turnip head, now you take care of your Mum while I'm away, okay?..I love you."
"See you soon."
"Be careful Charlie, okay?
"Yeah."

But she wouldn't see him soon. She would never see him again. There were so many things she wanted to say. She wanted to thank him, to love him and tell him. So why didn't she? Because Claire thought she would see him soon. The entire tent reminded her of him sitting there alone. The paper she still held, almost forgetting about it, she set down on the cot next to her for it to dry. Glancing at the peanut butter jars. One empty, and one still full. Leaning over to pick up the empty one, Aaron had stopped crying still playing with her hair. She wanted to keep this one, showing it to Aaron but something had caught her eye as she tried to smile down at Aaron. Holding him close she leaned down and glanced into his crib. The DS pointing up.

"Charlie..." She whispered again. Reaching in to pick up the ring, she couldn't help but cry again. Standing up showing Aaron the ring, as he started playing with it. Another bounce for him, she kissed his cheek. Looking up as she spoke, in the distance there was something else. Squinting her eyes when she shifted Aaron in her arms, wiping away the fresh tears, she tried to make out what it was. As it flew up into the air, with a tagged leg, the bird soared out above the ocean. Covering the top of her eyes from the glare of the sun. The sight of the sea gull, was fading beyond the clouds.

"What I saw Charlie was, Claire and her baby getting into a helicopter. A helicopter that, lifts off, leaves this Island."

Watching the bird fly away, a humming sound started growing louder, holding to Aaron a helicopter charged the sky as she could hear in the background screams and applauds from the others. Rescue was here. Claire sat back down on her cot. Everything was not going to be alright, Claire thought. Everything was going to change. Looking out into the ocean as Aaron played with the ring. A deep inhale, closing her eyes with one thought."..I love you, Charlie Pace.."