ficinabottle

Title: Alone
Author: breathing_lost
Rating: PG
Featured Characters: Sawyer and Claire
Summary: Sawyer is once again alone until Claire decides to keep him company
Status: completed

Sawyer sat in the sand alone staring out into the ocean. He had always been one to prefer being by himself, but after being shot he found himself changed somehow. He actually missed the company of others, but couldn’t bring himself to become Mr. Joe Joiner with the rest of the group so instead he continued to distance himself.

It used to be that Kate would come and spend time with him, and even though he pretended as if he didn’t want her around, he always hoped she could secretly tell it meant everything to him that someone actually took time out of their day to spend it keeping him company. All that changed a few weeks earlier when Kate must have noticed the way that Ana-Lucia had been looking at Jack because ever since Jack and Ana had become attached at the hip, Kate was no longer willing to just sit with Sawyer.

He turned his head toward the large group of people sitting further down the beach. Watching as they laughed when Hurley told a joke or listening to Charlie play his guitar. Sawyer knew he had caused this loneliness himself by the way he had acted before the raft set sail, but that didn’t mean it still didn’t hurt.

“Hey” a quiet voice came from behind him. He cocked his head to see Claire standing there a small smile forming. Sawyer felt a small tingle in his stomach at the sight of someone actually making conversation with him.

“Hey Mamacita, what you doin all the way out here, shouldn’t you be over there with Chuckie getting your koom-by-yas out?” He turned his head back and continued to stare out at the ocean.

“If you want to be alone, I understand.” She gave a small nod toward him and began to head over to the large group.

He hesitated for a moment. He wanted to be able to actually converse with someone, but didn’t want it to be that obvious.

“Hey, you don’t gotta leave” he called out to the beautiful young blonde. She turned back toward him and just smiled. She walked over and sat down next to him in the sand. It occurred to Sawyer that he hadn’t even realized that she had the baby in her arms the whole time.

“What’s his name?” he asked gesturing toward the small infant.

“Aaron” she replied smiling down at her son and playing with his fingers. “How are you feeling?”

“Well I ain’t gonna be playin football or nothin anytime soon, but doc says I’ll live”

“That’s good” she lifted her gaze from her child to Sawyer’s eyes and for a moment she let them linger in them before breaking away and staring out at the water.

“Is it? I’m not so sure about that” he picked up a stick that he had been playing with in the sand and flicked it out in front of him.

“Hey if you want a pity party, you’re looking at the wrong girl.” She cocked her head to the side and raised her eyebrows. Something about the way she looked when she did that Sawyer found very adorable. “Can’t complain to a girl who gave birth with no drugs in the middle of the jungle on an island that is far from normal”

Sawyer gave a small laugh. “Got me there Chika”

“Can I ask you a question?” Claire lifted Aaron up and laid his head against her shoulder

“Depends” he smiled coyly at her flashing his dimples. “If I answer do I get a prize” he looked her body up and down and then flashed a large smile in her direction.

“Please, you have got to be kidding? I just gave birth!” she laughed.

“Ain't never stopped me before Sunshine.” He turned to face her. She shot a look toward him that screamed ‘In your dreams’. “Alright, alright Snowflake, I get it, you only like them short, British, Wannabe supasta types right?”

“No it’s not that…Charlie and I….we’re not…I mean I don’t…never mind that’s none of your business.” She quickly changed the subject. “Why do you push everyone away, I mean, I don’t know you very well I know. The time we’ve been on the Island it’s not like we’ve been best friends or anything, but it seems to me that you tend to ostracize yourself from everyone else.”

“You’re here now aren’t ya, so I ain’t ostracizing myself right now am I?”
“Yeah, but I came to you, remember?”

“Look Pumpkin, people don’t like me, and I don’t like them, and it ain’t a big deal. I like it better that way, let me do my own thing ya know?” he shot at her.

“You’re fake, Sawyer.”

“Scuse me?”

“You’re fake. You say that you would rather be alone, that you hate people, but I was watching you before I came over here and I saw you watching everyone and the look I saw in your eye wasn’t that of contempt. You were sad that you were alone. And besides that when I said I would leave you by yourself, you quickly asked me to stay.”

“Correction sweet cheeks I didn’t ask you to stay, I said you don’t have to go”

“Same thing” she smiled at him.

“Well maybe I didn’t want to be with everyone else, maybe I just wanted to be with you, ever think of that Blondie?”

She smiled and once again caught his gaze. This time it seemed neither one of them could break it. Then the sound of a baby’s cry broke them apart.

“I better go, he needs to be changed, and I should get back and get him into bed before it gets too dark anyway.” Sawyer stood up and gave Claire his hand, helping her up from the beach. She looked up at him one last time and smiled. “Sawyer, just remember you’re not alone here, there are people who do think you are worth spending time with.” She looked down at her son and then back up at Sawyer. “Don’t forget.” She turned away from him and began to head toward the large group of people sitting around the fire.

Sawyer smiled to himself and sat back down into the sand. He had never felt less alone in his entire life.

The End